Friday, June 30, 2006

My lovely cat has such a lovely tail

As I did venture forth into the academic world today, I stumbled across a lovely striped yellow cat. Upon subsequent inspection, I didst discover that said cat had no tail, merely a stump, much like the tuxedo cat Domino. Poor little cat. The other cats may discriminate against him for lack of a tail or, even worse, mistake the poor creature for a guinea pig. Luckily, my stately cat has a very lovely tail, one she often takes for granted.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

on the horrors of life below dog

New neighbor in apartment above me acquired a dog yesterday. It barks incessantly. Sometimes howls. May need to invest in a housewarming present for neighbor. Was thinking of a muzzle . . .

Saturday, June 24, 2006

A furious and prolonged act of housekeeping

And so we come once again upon the semi-annual festival of housecleaning. With the assistance of Arcade Fire, various 80s artists, and my lovely cat Gergiev (who sits in the corner eyeing my bucket and sheepskin duster as though they might be toys), I toiled many long hours yesterday upon my bedroom and bathroom. Furniture was polished. Cabinets were cleaned. Ceiling fan was dusted. Scuffs were removed from walls. Baseboards were looked at with long sighs and anticipation, but so far without any actual attention from sponge. Today, the kitchen and office shall be attempted. But first, I must away to eat something, having recovered from feeling rather sick after an ill-timed run in the late morning heat. Furthermore, the stately Gergiev is perched directly in front of the screen, making it nigh impossible to type with any proficiency.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Return from the blue lagoon . . .

Having returned home from venture out into that faraway land of Daytona, your humble narrator dost find her lovely cat to be as saucy as ever and her lovely apartment to be rather dirtier than usual, much in need of a proper dusting. Furthermore, bathroom ceiling has developed a rather troublingly persistent leak, while my always lovely students become ever more demanding. In other words, your narrator finds herself much in need--of sleep, of time, of sanity. With but world enough and time, she could maintain peace and cleanliness whilst also teaching and dissertating. Alas, the world dost not comply with her most fervent pleas . . . and so your humblest of narrators must away to return once more to the horrors of the quotidian.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

No Trespassing!!

The lovely apartment that I provide to house my generally docile feline offers an abundance of proper quarters for sleeping and lounging: sofa, upholstered chairs, bed, coffee table, window ledges, frequently available laps, etc. Yet my little cat apparently is not satisfied with such accommodations that I lavish upon her, forcing your humble narrator to post a list of forbidden locations:

1. Upon my hair.
2. Upon my back.
3. In front of computer screen when said computer is in use.
4. Upon the kitchen table.
5. In the dishwasher.
6. On top of the stove.
7. In the oven.

In order to pre-empt any accusations of humanism on the part of certain catist crusaders, I shall note that the above list applies to humans as well as to felines.

Friday, June 02, 2006

Cat test question

The following question appeared in The Do You Really Love Cats Test on OKCupid!:

Do you have any cats?
No, but I want some.
I am a cat.

If you know a cat person, you realize how funny it is.