Saturday, April 01, 2006

Felines of the World, Unite!

Before attempting advocacy, my feline companion, I'm afraid you must first raise awareness of the most abominable treatment that occurs daily to cats such as Lewis. Someone from the Fraternal Order of Police (or some organization to that effect) called me this morning soliciting a donation. I told him that I could not in good conscience donate any money to police officers who will not defend the unalienable right of cats to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And what was his response? He was completely confused. Had no idea what feline civil liberties were all about or why cats would need guaranteed access to trial by jury.

Everyone knows that dogs play poker, but how many people out there know that cats play pool? Exactly . . . this is the problem. So go forth, little Gergie, and educate the world about your wondrousness. Show those who would keep the Cat down the infinite talents of felines everywhere.

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