Jeni's new career
Last night, I hypnotized a cat named Blocks. He sat and purred in my lap for over an hour whilst I communicated with him telepathically, and today he shall do my bidding, terrorizing dogs and squirrels all around the world (ok, maybe just Tulsa). We shall soon see how my little experiment worked. I used a little known hynotic technique referred to as scalperiosis, which involves the skilled use of long fingernails to soothe the patient. Perhaps once I perfect my powers, I can attempt to conquer the daytime talk show circuit as a cat-whisperer . . .